Today I had one of those moments when the world feels like it is caving in around me. It started off as such a great day. We celebrated the 4th of July at church. I have always been patriotic but now that I have a son who is a Marine it takes on a whole new meaning. We had a great message in worship and Sunday School and then lunch with wonderful friends.
We get home, Mike is outside with the girls and then without a warning I am overwhelmed with some mountains that stand before me and I just feel like I don't have the strength to climb. I got in my van without saying a word to anyone and drove. I had no idea where I was going but I ended up at a park. I prayed and just sat there enjoying the peace and quiet. I told God, "I have no where to go and no one to turn to. I feel so alone, so empty." He said " you have me." " But Lord I have prayed, believed and persevered and tomorrow when I wake up those problems will still be there. I am tired and I don't think I can do this one more day. I just don't have the strength. I don't want to give up, but..."
There was only one other car there and in the distance I saw a man who looked like he was teaching a younger man how to play basketball. After watching for a bit it was obvious the younger man had some disabilities. I watched as the man patiently and gently showed the young man how to shoot hoops. He would just drop the ball, but every single time the man would pick up the ball lay his hand on the young mans shoulder and show him again. After a little while they went and sat on the bench and the man had his arm around the young mans shoulder. Then they got up and headed very slowly back to their car. The young man seemed to have cerebral palsy. He walked slowly and his steps were unsure. The older man kept his arm on the younger man, guiding him gently and very carefully so he would not fall, always at his side. As I watched them I saw God and how He helps us with our steps. Slowly, carefully and gently always by our side, holding on to us and never letting go. So even in those times when we believe He is not there by our side, He is. His Spirit is so gentle we often forget He is by our side...always.
I sat there thanking God for once again showing me that I am not alone. He is a big God and that things that I believe are impossible ,He can make possible.