Can you say mammogram?

I had my yearly mammogram today. I have mine on or close to my birthday. Kind of a present to myself. BUT I want to talk about this process. Don't get me wrong I am soooo grateful for them. But I have to say I kind of wonder who thought of it. I think maybe a husband who was mad at his wife. Anyway it had to be a man.
Ok, first of all you can't wear deodorant before you have one. The one time you are going to sweat like a hog and you can't wear deoderant! Then you get to the radiologist and go into a very small room where you are told to undress from the waist up. They now have this little cape with one snap in the front. I felt like "Mammogram Woman" I mean you already feel silly now you have to wear a cape. A new thing I experienced today is they now put these pretty little band aids on YOUR nipples. Ok,like that isn't awkward. Supposedly this gives the Dr or radiologist a focus of which way the boob is going. I find this very concerning. You can't tell which way the boob is going? I see my x-rays and I know which way they are pointing! Personally I think the tech puts them on for a laugh. Cape pulled back, bandaids on now you step up and the tech grabs your boob and moves it around on this cold glass plate like it is play dough. They shape it anyway they want too. Then you are suppose to lay back and relax the shoulder opposite of the boob that is being flattened like a pancake, hold your breath and pray to God you do not pass out! Then you hear those dreaded words "we have to take that one over again." Of course you do. Let's not forget there are the many different poses. You kind of feel like you are getting a mug shot! When all is said and done you and your cape go back to a room the size of a small closet where they offer deodorant, get dress, go on and pray that no lumps are found.

SAVE THE BOOBIES! THINK PINK!