You know, that you know, that you know. My pastor says that often. What does he mean? Well, it depends on the situation. On this day I know, that I know, that I know that God knows I have done everything in my power to be faithful, patient and persevere through this last year. I have had to change a lot in the way I think and act. Today, He opened the window and let a light of hope shine in! It was small but exactly what I needed at exactly the time I needed it. I knew right then He was hearing my prayers. I know that someday I will look back at this time and thank God for it. It has made me more faithful, stronger and has changed my walk with the Lord for the better.
God has also placed a little girl in China on my heart. I am not quite sure if she came to me or I came to her, but she is now on my heart. Now for those of my friends who are freaking out thinking "ARE YOU CRAZY!" Stop right there. I have no idea why we were brought together, but I do not question God. Are we too adopt her? I have not had that confirmed in my heart nor has it been pushed away. Am I just to pray for her too find a family? Always!
But a few things of interest and you are welcome to give me your thoughts on this.
1. Out of all the orphans I have access to she is the only one who can be adopted by parents up to 55 and the only one who was placed on my heart.
2. When she was put on my heart I thought "Oh know you have to be kidding?" no response, but to pray.
3. I reached for a stack of verses that were laying on the table and in my very human way said "Ok God give me a verse to show me what this means. One side has a quote the other a bible verse. I see the quote first, one of my favorites. "What lies behind us and what lies before us are tiny matters compared to what lies within us." Ralph Waldo Emerson . The bible verse was,
" By their fruit you will recognize them." Matthew 7:16
4. That same day a very good friend who has adopted three children from China in the last 4 or 5 years 2 in the last year and a half emailed me to say they were feeling lead to adopt again. They have 6 like us and a pretty good age range.
5. Out of pure curiosity this morning I asked Kennedy who always says " no more babies" if she would ever want a little sister. For the first time the answer was ''yes."
6. Then this window of hope opened this morning.
My plans were to be a lawyer, have a husband and have 2 boys and 2 girls and save the world and have awith a fancy house, blah blah blah. God had a much better plan for my life. One very important thing I havefound out on this journey is the fact I do not need stuff and prestige too be happy. I need God. Simple as that. What ever He desires for my life I am happy with that. So, please pray that Gods will is done.